How to Ask for References

• Decide how you will ask someone to be one of your references:  In person, by phone, or through email.
• Be sure to make this request in a quiet and non-distracting setting. 
• Plan what you will say and how you will say it ahead of time. 
• Ask your reference which email address, phone number, and mailing address they prefer for you to use.
• Provide your references with a copy of your resume. 
• Be sure to say "thank you" when someone agrees to be a reference for you.

If you choose to ask in person, ask at time that is convenient for them.   You should ask them when it is quiet and when there is a small number of people around, preferably just the two of you.  For example, it is not a good idea to ask someone to be a reference after a work meeting in a crowded conference room.  However, the following examples are good times and locations to ask someone to be a reference:

• In a quiet office setting (at work)
• Over coffee or lunch
• After your class has ended
• Before or after school

Plan what you will say and how you will say it ahead of time!  Write down notes that you can review before you see your potential reference. 

Give your reference a copy of your resume so that they can speak most knowledgeably about you if they are contacted.  Inform them of relevant or new skills that they may want to mention if contacted.

Here is an example of how to ask someone to be one of your references in person:

"Hi, Gary. How are you?..... Do you have a minute to talk?.... I am applying for jobs in the food industry, and I need to provide my potential employers with references.  Would you be willing to be one of my references?"

• If the person agrees to be your reference, be sure to thank them.  They are helping you get a job, so it is important for you to show them that you are grateful for their help.
  
  
• If the person you ask is not able to give you a good recommendation or does not say yes, do not use that person.  

If you call someone to ask them to be your reference, you can say something very similar to the example provided above.

Here is another example of what to say:

"Hi, Louise, it’s Martha.  How are you doing? ….Is now a convenient time to talk? ….. I was wondering if you could help me out.  I am searching for a janitorial job.  Because you have seen my previous work skills, I was wondering if you would be willing to be a reference for me? ….. I really appreciate your help with this."

A few rules for calling someone:

• Plan what you will say and how you will say it ahead of time!  Write down  notes or a script that you can use as you make the phone call. 

• If you get the person’s voicemail, leave a message with your name and number and ask them to call you when it is convenient.  Do not ask them to be your reference on their voicemail because that would be unprofessional. 

• If they do not return your call, wait 1 full week before calling them again. 

• After leaving 2 messages that have not been returned, STOP calling them.  If they are not willing to call you back, they may not be a good reference for you.

• If the person agrees to be a reference, remember to say "thank you."  It is important for you to show this person that you are grateful for their help.

Email is a good way to ask someone to be your reference because you can plan and edit the way you ask.  It is a good idea to have someone proofread your email before sending it.

Here is an example of how to ask for a reference though email:

Dear Ms. Johnson,

I am currently applying for a job in the retail industry.  Since you are familiar with my work ethic from supervising me at Whole Foods, I was hoping you would be willing to serve as a reference for me.  If so, would it be okay to provide your contact information on my resume or if I am asked to provide a reference during the job application process? I have also attached my resume for you to see.  I really appreciate your help and look forward to seeing you again soon.

Thank you,

John Norwood

A few rules for emailing someone:

• Make sure your email is professional.  No typos or informal language (phrases such as "LOL" or "TTYL," or abbreviations such as "bc" for" because").
• Attach your resume.
• If they do not reply to your email, wait 1 full week until you email them again.
• After sending 2 emails without receiving a reply, STOP emailing them.  At this point, you could try calling them only ONCE or ask them in person.

Social Media like Facebook, Linkedin, etc. is an acceptable way to contact someone for a reference if you don’t already have other contact information.  You can ask for their email address or phone number by contacting them “privately” via social media.   Once you have their contact information you should then use their email or telephone for any further information exchange.